Day 52: Mm… Chocolate

Another double workout day. I started with Cardio Abs as it eases me into the adrenaline-fest that is Max Cardio. At least this way, I make sure I complete both by saving most of my energy for the main workout.

I’m still maintaining my weight so at least I’m not misreading the scales. Of course, it’s taken me years of bad habits to accumulate this state of unfitness and weight and I’m trying to remind myself that it’s unrealistic to expect it to be undone in 9 weeks. Meanwhile, all this hard work and deprivation really teaches me a lesson on how much damage I’ve done to my body over the years through lack of exercise and poor eating. I’m only having to work this hard and give up calories because I have so many mistaken habits to correct. But even though the weight is coming off more slowly than I expected, I feel I’m really earning it, inch by inch, pound by pound.

I’m aware that I can’t get complacent with my food intake so I’m continuing to make a note of what I eat and when I eat. It helps me to view food as fuel. It’s such a clinical term but it keeps me focused on the more practical aspects of nutrition and reminds me of how unnecessary junk food is for me, in terms of my energy requirements. But chocolate is my Achilles heel.

With wonderful timing, a good friend decided to send me a photo of the delicious hot chocolate & cream that she was enjoying at some outdoor Christmas market. I found myself almost licking the screen of my phone. Oh how cruel life is. I contemplated cutting her out of my life but then I thought I might be overreacting. Instead, I politely thanked her for torturing me and she said “You’re welcome”. So I had a small piece of Lindor chocolate to tide me over. It’s my morphine – it soothes the pain.

I now know that I will do Insanity again – not just to lose weight but to continue to build my strength and fitness. I am astounded at how much more confident I feel about tackling physical activities. When I park the car down a faraway street, I no longer groan about having to walk a certain distance. Now I positively welcome the chance to stretch my legs and enjoy the fresh air.

The workouts may still be a challenge to get through but my mental attitude towards physical activity has definitely changed for the better. And that’s a gift I really didn’t expect this Christmas.


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