Day 37: Plyometrics ver. 2.0

Not a chance.

Not a chance, Tania. Not a chance.

I was beginning to think that scaring myself before I do these workouts actually helps because so far, it’s not been as horrific as I thought it was going to be. How wrong I was.

This was the one I was dreading most of all – Plyometrics version 2.0. By now, we all know how much I hate the P word. Put ‘Max’ in front of it and you may as well just order me a taxi.

I found myself laughing maniacally throughout Shaun T’s instruction, much as I did yesterday, mostly because of the sheer lunacy of some of the drills. One exercise in particular, the ‘Side Push Ups’, is just so mind-boggling to even think about that I had to rewind the footage to listen to the instructions again.

Basically, you place your hands perpendicular to your body to form an L shape, draw your legs out to the side, resting one foot on top of the other, and then do regular push ups. Like you’re some kind of sweaty mermaid, basking on a rock. It took me forever to get my form right with this one. And even then, I found it incredibly difficult to lower and raise myself in this awkward position.

Darryl Hannah demonstrates push-ups.

Daryl Hannah demonstrates push-ups.

You do all other kinds of weird things in Max Interval Plyo: you bend over on one leg like a drinking bird toy; you do push ups balancing only on one arm and one leg; you perform plank jumps with your legs so far apart you feel like you’re straddling a hippogriff.

Worst of all – for me at least – is Level 3 Drills which involves 32 push-ups per round. I think I managed about 10. Hey, at least it’s double figures.

Same as yesterday, watch your form and take it slow. There’s so much twisting and turning as you perform explosive jumps that the risk of injury again runs high. The ‘power push-ups’ and ‘squat push-ups’ place tremendous pressure on your quads, glutes and back so be mindful of using your core and pacing yourself.

The Max Interval Plyo Breakdown:

Warm Up

Stretch

Circuit 1: 3 rounds
Switch jumps
Squat Push-Ups
Wide In & Out Abs
Power Jumps
‘Bonus’: One Legged “V” Push-Ups

Circuit 2: 3 rounds
Pogo Right & Left
Power Push-Ups
Globe Twist
Level 3 Drills
‘Bonus’: Power Lunges / Hop Squats

Circuit 3: mercifully, only 1 round
Side Push-Ups
Kickstand Touch the Floor
8 Power Knees / 4 Diamond Jumps
Balance Push-Ups

Cool Down Stretch

Curiously, I did develop a grudging respect for Max Interval Plyo by the end. (Yes, I am sober.) Perhaps it’s the novelty of all the new exercises, or maybe my body is ready for new challenges but so far, I’m kind of enjoying the Max workouts.

I even relish my aching obliques and stiff back because it’s proof that I’m working hard. I find myself toying with the idea of a 2 mile run around the local park after work, because I’ve deluded myself into believing I’m an athlete. Shaun T, what have you done to me?

Right, enough of this nonsense. I’m off to sit in a corner and impersonate an old lady.

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